Tag Archives: Birthday

TD1’s Truly Outrageous 6th Birthday

Yesterday, TD1 turned six and we celebrated with  a Jem and the Holograms themed birthday party. Party guests received “VIP Passes” and were encouraged to wear their best rockstar gear. It was “Truly Outrageous!” That phrase might be stuck in my head for a while now.

TD1 was very adamant about inviting her entire class and all her friends, so we had a huge party with our family and her friends from church and school. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that meant LOTS of kids. As the days fast approached, I could feel my anxiety exploding inside of me. Would I be able to handle so many kids in one place at one time? Will everyone get along okay? Is it going to be awkward having a party at the church? Did I invite everyone I was supposed to? Are we going to be able to pull this off in two hours? What am I forgetting? What can I delegate? Who can I ask for help? What am I forgetting? Am I crazy for doing this? What am I forgetting? I made checklists and sticky notes and notes inside apps and I still couldn’t stop the spiral.

Momfession: I wanted to cancel the party. Our life right now has been disrupted in quite a few ways (good, bad and just is-what-it-is), and we’re trying to adjust to a new normal. But TD1 asked for this party. It’s all she wanted for her birthday. She’s been so excited, helping me create the invitations, pick out pictures and costumes and giving her input along the way. This was her party. So as much as I wanted to throw in the towel, my mom heart wouldn’t let me. I’m glad too. Seeing the smile on her face throughout the day made it all worth it. A very special thank you to everyone that helped with the planning, implementation and cleanup and to everyone that came out to celebrate with us. YOU GUYS ROCK!!!

The night before her big day, we were getting ready for bed and I was giving my usual hugs and kisses when it hit me. Tomorrow, I will no longer have a five-year-old. She will be six.

T-Mommy: This is your last hug as a five-year-old. Tomorrow, you’ll be six. How does it feel?
TD1: Good and confusing.
T-Mommy: Why confusing?
TD1: Because it came too fast.
T-Mommy: I feel the same way. *super big hug*

Yes, six came waaaayyy too fast. In a matter of weeks, TD1 lost her first two teeth and celebrated another birthday. She’s planning sleepovers with her classmates, talking to me about babies being born, natural disasters and people dying, trying to read everything, and having an opinion about everything. I’m watching her use her reasoning and deduction skills, practice running and exercise moves so she can be better and faster, and become more self-aware. She’s really practicing listening to her body and knowing what she needs emotionally, physically and mentally. She’s stepping up to look out for her sister. She’s being an all-around awesome human. I wish I could say it was all me and T-Daddy, but it’s not. TD1 has an awesome community of adults and children that love her and are helping to encourage awesome character traits and beliefs. The same goes for TD2. And it’s never been more evident than these last few weeks leading up to her big day.

Six isn’t a milestone birthday (unless it’s a golden birthday), but somehow this birthday seemed to be a huge milestone birthday for us. It was like a unique rite of passage for TD1. One that is a tinge bittersweet, yet abundantly joyous.

Turning 26 and Putting Aside Childish Things

My aunt recently told me “You’re officially a grown person now. You know 25 is the cutoff for little kids. Now you’re 26, you’re almost 30.”

And I have to say, she was right. Last year, I just wanted to go out and paint the town green for my birthday, get completely wasted and I guess relive the “glory” days of being carefree in college. This year, I had no such desire. I guess that’s what being pregnant (and sick) and saving for a new child and new apartment will get ya.

Leading up to my birthday, I admit I was a little depressed. I didn’t have the energy, desire or money to do anything. Somewhere deep inside of me, I was hoping somebody else would take the reigns and plan something, but that didn’t happen. (And it’s probably about time I give up on this childhood dream of a surprise party lol). As the days wound down to my big day, I found myself feeling a mix of pity, resentment and sadness – totally unlike me for my birthday.

Luckily several things happened that quickly changed my outlook and got me out of the funk I was in (I’m just gonna blame it on the pregnancy hormones….35 weeks preggo, they’re running rampant I tell ya.)

  1. Todd reminded me that he was planning something. Although his ideas and ways of doing things are different from mine, this casual reminder was what I needed. (Not to mention he’s kinda obligated under this invisible contract called a relationship and parenting to do something for me, at the very least from his daughter(s).) 
  2. My brother told me he wanted us to celebrate together. Not really sure why this picked me up since I’m still convinced he’s some alien life form my mom rescued 24 years ago, but yet in still, it made me smile and made me feel better about my upcoming birthday. 
  3. My best friend (and lifesaver) offered to take me to see the Oz (which was AMAZING!!) because her little sister’s bday is the same weekend as my brother’s (and my payday which is what’s most important in celebrating) and she wanted to do something with me.

So how did I celebrate my bday? With my loved ones over the course of several days. And it reminded me why I love my birthday so much. It’s not because I spend a lot of money, or have some outrageous birthday party. It’s because it’s a reminder that I was blessed to spend another year with the people that I love doing the things that I love.

This year, I could complain that not one bar or club saw my face, or that I got sick two days before my birthday and didn’t actually get better until lunch time on my birthday. I could complain about the people that let me down or pissed me off on my special day. But then I would be wasting energy on the things that don’t matter when I could be focusing on the things that do: like best friends that know laughter and Vampire Diaries marathons cure any ailment; or friends and family that make sure you start your day with voicemails, texts and FB messages full of birthday wishes; or boyfriends that go out of their usually nonchalant, nonexpressive way to shower you with backrubs and affectionate words; or an adorably smiling daughter who wakes you up with hugs and kisses. And most importantly: Edible Arrangement bouquets personalized for you with white chocolate because you’re too intolerant of “regular” chocolate. Yup, these are the things that made my birthday fantastically awesome.

For me, birthdays are about celebrating life. Celebrating my life with those I love. They are about being blessed to see another year when so many – both older and younger – aren’t so blessed. They’re about love and happiness and rainbows and strawberries and peaches and cream.

26, or almost 30 as my Teet said, is going to be a year of growth and self-reflection for me. I’m about to be a mother of two kids and it’s about time I put aside my childish ways of thinking about things. This year, I’m on a journey to redefine myself by my standards, not society’s or the way I have in the past (i.e. my job and relationships).

It’s About Time

I know that I am beyond super late in posting this. It is coming on a month since Temi turned the BIG 1. Honestly, it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. I thought that I would be an emotional mess at the realization that my baby was growing up and was no longer a baby.

In actuality, I was too busy planning her party and tryna survive off of two hours of sleep to even give it much thought. I went from planning her party to heavy deadline at work to being sick with the worst cold ever to tryna get my mojo back. Between all of that, she went from 11 months to almost 13 months and I haven’t even caught my breath yet.
Everyday I watch her and I’m amazed and in awe. Every little thing amazes me. The way she smiles with her eyes. The cute way she pinches her fingers together. How she runs to me excited. How she snatches her daddy’s phone and looks at it like she actually knows what to do with it. Lately, she’s learned how to hold the phone up to her ear. She’ll sometime simulate this by holding her hand up to her ear and saying “hi” in it.
I was completely prepared to write a heart-wrenching, tear-inducing post about how I don’t want my baby to grow up and how I’m so sad. And while there are parts of me that misses when she was a fresh newborn straight from the hospital and all she could do was nestle her head into my chest, I know that I’ll soon get that again. In the meantime, it’s exciting to watch her grow. It makes me proud everytime she does something. If anything, I wish I could spend more time with her, do more things with her.
Yes, the first year came around too quick. Not because I wasn’t ready for her to grow up (cuz let’s face it, I’m not). No, it came around too quick because I didn’t get to do nearly half of the things I had hoped to do with her. She’s only been to the beach and park once. I’ve yet to take her to a movie, or a festival or outdoor anything. I haven’t started a tradition of any sort with her. I’m still trying to get our daily routine down. I’m still trying to balance the many roles I play. So if anything, Temi turning 1 has taught me that life’s not gonna wait for me to get it together. She’s not gonna wait for me to figure it all out. I have to seize the day by the moment before she’s my age and writing about her own kids. The next 11 months will no doubt be bumpy and full of unexpectedness, but it will also be full of lots of memories that me and Temi will make together. So that when she turns 24 months, I can cry.
Super duper thanks to all those that came and partied like it was 2012 with us! Temi had a blast and it made all my worrying and complaining worth it. I am really happy with how it all turned out and I truly feel blessed to have so many people that were willing to take time out of their Sunday to celebrate with us. For those that couldn’t make it, don’t worry, there’s pixand videos for you to enjoy. Sorry but I couldn’t save any of the cupcakes. 🙂

Check out these videos: