Career Woman vs. Mom

Years ago, I was talking to my supervisor about long-distance relationships and marriage when she told me that I wouldn’t sacifice my career for the man I loved. You see,she was in the middle of a crossroads – she loved her job but she hated doing the long-distance thing. She could easily get jobs closer to home, but they wouldn’t offer what she currently had. So she chose her career and prayed daily that a position would open up in the company that moved her closer to her boo. I was the same, she argued. She could see it in my eyes and my dedication to my internship that, I too, would make the same choice.

“You are dead wrong!! Your job should never come before those you love.” That’s what the fairytale romantic inside me was screaming at the top of her lungs.

But my supervisor was right. When it came my time to make the proverbial choice, I packed up and moved 12 hours away. Of course I talked it over with my boyfriend at the time, but in the end love wasn’t enough for me to throw away my career. Especially when “love” had no place for me to live, no signs of putting a ring on it anytime soon and no means to pay my bills that my internship was barely covering. At the end of the day, I couldn’t settle careerwise just to be close to the one I loved. Because let’s face it, if it was true love, it would conquer all – even 12 hours. Things didn’t work out the way I planned or hoped, but I never regretted that decision. I know that I did what I thought was in my best interest long-term with hopes that I’d be able to provide and enjoy the future I dreamed of. I loved my job. It was my baby, my pride and joy. It kept me going in a town where I was all alone.

Fast forward a relocation, layoff and two children later, and I am more than willing to settle careerwise to be close to the ones I love. When it comes to Tempess and Tové, I’d give up everything for them without thinking twice. At the same time, I still have hopes and aspirations. I have financial goals I want to achieve. I have pride in my work. (Who wouldn’t want to see their story make the cover of a magazine?)

And so the Career Woman and the Mom in me duke it out daily. Some weeks, the mom wins and I’m all about my home, my family, trying to stay at home. Other weeks, the CW wins and I’m looking for ways to grow professionally and learn new skills. Somewhere, there’s a nice bakery where the two sit down over pastries and hatch a plan to become partners instead of continually competing. I’m still looking for that bakery.