Helping TD2 rehearse for her school’s holiday program:
T-Mommy: [TD2] What are your hopes for the New Year?
TD2: I hope for a cat, a dog and a baby.
T-Mommy: A cat, a dog and a baby?
TD2: Yeah because they’re all soo0o0o0o cute and I just love them and want them all the time.
T-Mommy: And um, where do you think you’re getting any of those from?
TD2: The store.
T-Mommy: So you can just buy a baby at the store?
TD2: Yup! Or we can just ask Santa.
T-Mommy: Ask Santa for a baby?
TD2: Yeah, he has a hundred and he lives at the North Pole. So all we have to do is just go to the North Pole and buy a baby and a cat and a dog.
TD1 is in a Pre-K/K mixed class, so imagine my surprise when after school, the following convo took place:
TD1: Mommy, Ariel* and Belle* have a crush on Charming*.
T-Mommy: Oh really, and how do you know that?
TD1: I don’t know.
T-Mommy: Do you know what a crush is?
T-Mommy: So how do you know that they have something if you don’t know what that something is?
*a minute of going back and forth*
TD1: Okay, I do know. I just didn’t want to tell you in case you would be mad.
T-Mommy: Okay, so what do you know?
TD1: I know they have a crush on Charming because Ariel and Belle always tell Charming “I love you” and Aurora* told me they have a crush on Charming.
T-Mommy: And what does that mean? Do you know what it means to have a crush on someone?
TD1: It means you love them.
Are we there yet? I thought I had at least another 100 years before we were there. Why are we there already? Also, I googled crush and Google’s definition did NOT make this convo any easier…..we’ll go with when you like someone a lot as opposed to “a brief but intense infatuation for someone, especially someone unattainable or inappropriate.” That’s way too many big girl emotions I’m not ready for. Can we just go back to the days of cooing and baby gibberish?
*names have been changed to protect the innocent because who doesn’t love Disney characters.
TD1: Mom, why can’t I have two moms like you? I want two moms.
T-Mommy: Why do you want two moms?
TD1: So I can have two moms and two houses and two brothers and two sisters, like you have.
T-Mommy: Well, you know what it means if you have two moms? It means that Mommy and Daddy won’t be together anymore.
T-Mommy: Is that what you want?
T-Mommy: I don’t want that either. Mommy has two moms because my Mommy and Daddy aren’t together anymore. And I don’t want that for you. But you know what? You have a Godmom, and she’s kind of like a half-mom. So you have one and a half moms.
TD1: **big smile** So I have two moms. And I have a Goddad, so I have two dads and a Godsister so two sisters and a Godbrother, but only one brother. [TD2] Wake up! You have two moms and two dads and two sisters, but just one brother.
*a few weeks ago*
Me: You want some cheese to go with that whine?
TD1: *stops whining* what? Why you ask me that?
Me: *explains the whole cheese and wine/whine thing*
TD1: *singing* You want some cheese with that whine? You want some cheese with that whine? You want some cheese with that whine? *stops singing* Hey Mom, since I don’t like cheese I think you should say, “Do you want some pizza with that whine?” because pizza has cheese. Get it? *starts singing* You want some pizza cheese with that whine?
Overheard in the other room:
TD1: Books are not made to be ripped. They are made to be read.
TD2: You’re not posed to throw books.
TD1: Listen to me!! Books are made to be read. Not to be ripped. No more ripping books and that will make me happy. Ok?
TD2: Mommy, I really want be in Girl Scouts.
T-Mommy: Maybe next year Sweetie when you’re a little older.
TD2: But I want do it now!
*meltdown ensues for 0.5 seconds*
TD2: *singing* I wanna be a Girl Scout, a Girl Scout.
And she sang that song while she put her shoes and coat on, we walked to the car and the entire time we were in the car.
T-Mommy: What’s one thing you’re thankful for today?
TD1: Hmmmm. Everything!
TD1: What? You said one thing. That’s one thing.
T-Mommy: What are you thankful for?
Sometime last month, I was scrolling through Facebook when I came across this:
To which TD2 made me stop everything and scroll back up.
TD2: Look Mommy! She’s so pretty! She’s a princess. Her dress sparkles. And he’s a prince. They so pretty!
T-Mommy: What’s daddy’s name?
TD2: Not nothing.
TD1: It’s T*****.
TD2: Nooooo, it’s nothing.
TD1: Yes, it is T*****.
TD2: No, I T*****!